Stiff Penalties
Watching Tiger Woods, I didn’t hit “Mute” soon enough when the commercials started, so I heard the words,
“Cialis for Babies”
I’m against that. I turned the sound back on, and it turned out I had misheard the words, “Cialis for day use” or daily use or some such subharmonic in the siren song of the four-hour erection.
I used to play golf with a doctor who told me he hoped no one ever called him with that problem because he wouldn’t know what to do. I said, just refer the person to a nurse. They all know what to do. They have a little rubber hammer in a drawer somewhere, they give the offending member a quick rap, and it wilts like a prom corsage.
That conundrum aside, despite vigilant use of the “Mute,” I’ve heard more than enough Cialis and Viagra and Levitra commercials for one lifetime.
By now everyone who’s eligible knows about wet noodle enhancement therapy, so the endless TV advertising is largely impotent, and the marketers owe us all some compensation for what they’ve put us through.
Let’s confiscate their advertising budgets and invest the money in a worthy and appropriate cause.
Say, the stimulus package?
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Wet noodle therapy? Isn’t that when you throw it against the refrigerator to see if it sticks?
Comment by Lynn — June 16, 2009 @ 8:34 am
I believe you’re referring to the Amana Banana theory, much favored by Italian chefs until it was banned by Pope Benedict — or was it Bob Dole?– based on the suspicion that al dente referred to oral sex.
Comment by Al — June 16, 2009 @ 5:38 pm