The Bush Presidential Liberry - Updated with Photos!
We would love to give proper attribution for this sneak preview of the Bush Library, but it arrived, like so many others circulating by e-mail, absent of any clue as to authorship. Our thanks to the unknown originator, and special thanks to Betty Layport Feher for the glorious idea we’ve rendered above — of housing the Bush Library in a FEMA trailer.
The Library will include:
The Hurricane Katrina Room, which is still under construction.
The Alberto Gonzales Room. Have you seen that? You can’t remember?
The Texas Air National Guard Room. Skip this one. No need to show up.
The Walter Reed Hospital Room, where they don’t let you in.
The Guantanamo Bay Room, where they don’t let you out.
The Weapons of Mass Destruction Room, which no one has been able to find.
The National Debt Wing. Bigger than a WalMart, and it has no ceiling.
The ‘Tax Cut’ Room: admission restricted to the fabulously wealthy.
The ‘Economy Room.‘ You’ll find it in the toilet.
The Iraq War Room. After you complete your first tour, they make you go back for a second, third, fourth, and sometimes a fifth.
The Dick Cheney Room, in an undisclosed location.
The Environmental Conservation Room. Still empty.
The Supreme Court Gift Shop, where you can buy an election.
The ‘Decider Room’ complete with dart board, magic 8-ball, Ouija board, dice, coins, and straws.
The museum will be equiped with an electron microscope to help you locate the President’s accomplishments.
Step right up and get your tickets!!!
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Bill Maher’s viewer blog has picked up on this. Some neat comments.
Comment by Mrs D. — October 20, 2008 @ 11:51 am
Fantastically Funny! Great job!!!!! Decider Room with straws
HAHA
Comment by mike — October 20, 2008 @ 12:08 pm
Perhaps, we don’t need to spend the dollars on a FEMA trailer.
Perhaps all we need is a can of spray paint.
That way each city that has been the beneficary of the wit and wisdom of the administration of “W” could quite cost-efficiently designate certain structures as W Legacy sites.
In Ohio, for example,it might be an abandoned factory with graffiti scrawled across the locked and barred entrance, saying “W was here.”
In NYC, the N.Y. Stock Exchange could do the same, right across its pediment. Lehman Brothers, Bear Sterns could easily use the “Glass Wax” technique on their skyscraper windows.
However, in Alaska, an investment in an abandoned barge might be necessary, as melting glaciers wouldn’t provide the permanence W’s legacy on environment deserves.
I am sure, almost every community has a site appropriate for such a display of patriotism and rememberance of the era that was “W”.
I know in my neighborhood, forclosure signs would be a good place to start.
Comment by Mrs D. — October 20, 2008 @ 8:37 pm
Excellent idea. A distributive presidential (anti)legacy system. The reverse of “George Washington slept here.” Maybe your signs should say “George W. crept here” ?
Comment by Al — October 20, 2008 @ 9:47 pm
Put Barb on this one!
Comment by Mrs D. — October 21, 2008 @ 5:26 am
I know of no better way to ruin a perfectly good FEMA trailer.
Comment by Steve Alber — October 21, 2008 @ 9:06 am
Good Fema Trailer?
If you like formaldehyde, yep.
Comment by Mrs D. — October 21, 2008 @ 9:55 am
And just out of idle curiosity, will any of the rooms in The Bush Library actually have any books?
Comment by Steve Alber — October 29, 2008 @ 2:30 pm
Books? Theeee Bush Library don’t need no stinking books.
Comment by Mrs D. — October 29, 2008 @ 2:39 pm
Books? When we posted this on DailyKos, one of the commenters said “My Pet Goat” had been published in 30-some languages. So one of those should make it — as soon as they figure out which language has the shortest words.
Comment by Al — October 29, 2008 @ 9:13 pm
http://video.google.com/videosearch?hl=en&rls=com.microsoft:en-us:IE-SearchBox&rlz=1I7RNWI&resnum=0&q=Desperation%20Row&um=1&ie=UTF-8&sa=N&tab=wv#q=sarah%20palin%20&hl=en&emb=0&st=week&start=30
This Should definitely be included in the LieBrary.
Video evidence of Bush’s greatness courtesy of Neil Young.
Comment by Mrs D. — November 3, 2008 @ 9:45 am
And this, published in October 2000:
http://gailsheehy.com/Politics/polimain_bush3.html
“…He likes best to run in the hammering heat of the Texas noonday sun, and he hits the concrete running. No warm-up, no stretching. George Bush is a “red-ass in a hurry,” as the sportswriters say in Texas, meaning he has a whole lot of energy and aggression to burn off or he’s likely to blow. He has always been that way. When Barbara Bush took her 13-year-old son and his best friend, Doug Hannah, to play golf at her Houston club, George would start cursing if he didn’t tee off well. His mother would tell him to quit it. By the third or fourth hole he would be yelling “Fuck this” until he had ensured that his mother would send him to the car.
“It fit his needs,” says Hannah. “He couldn’t lose.”
Once, after his mother banished him from the golf course, she turned to Hannah and declared, “That boy is going to have optical rectosis.” What did that mean? “She said, ‘A shitty outlook on life.’”
Even if he loses, his friends say, he doesn’t lose. He’ll just change the score, or change the rules, or make his opponent play until he can beat him. “If you were playing basketball and you were playing to 11 and he was down, you went to 15,” says Hannah, now a Dallas insurance executive. “If he wasn’t winning, he would quit. He would just walk off…. It’s what we called Bush Effort: If I don’t like the game, I take my ball and go home. Very few people can get away with that.” So why could George get away with it? “He was just too easygoing and too pleasant.”
Looks like the “Bush Effort” of just waking away is now verified as he spends the last days of the 2008 presidential campaign in an undisclosed location and packs his bags as he leaves it to the next president to clean up America.
“…Another fast friend, Roland Betts, acknowledges that it is the same in tennis. In November 1992, Bush and Betts were in Santa Fe to host a dinner party, but they had just enough time for one set of doubles. The former Yale classmates were on opposite sides of the net. “There was only one problem—my side won the first set,” recalls Betts. “O.K., then we’re going two out of three,” Bush decreed. Bush’s side takes the next set. But Betts’s side is winning the third set when it starts to snow. Hard, fat flakes. The catering truck pulls up. But Bush won’t let anybody quit. “He’s pissed. George runs his mouth constantly,” says Betts indulgently. “He’s making fun of your last shot, mocking you, needling you, goading you—he never shuts up!” They continued to play tennis through a driving snowstorm…”
These are documents well worth preserving.
And this: published in January, 2001
http://www.theonion.com/content/index/3701
” WASHINGTON, DC–Mere days from assuming the presidency and closing the door on eight years of Bill Clinton, president-elect George W. Bush assured the nation in a televised address Tuesday that “our long national nightmare of peace and prosperity is finally over.”
Comment by Mrs D. — November 3, 2008 @ 9:58 am
http://chronicle.com/free/v54/i26/26b01401.htm
Great minds work in mysterious ways!!!
Comment by Mrs D. — November 20, 2008 @ 6:22 am
Excellent additions to the archives. Just wait ’til that FEMA trailer is towed onto the SMU campus.
Comment by Al — November 20, 2008 @ 9:41 pm