Shrub’s Approval Ratings Black Hole

Friday June 22nd 2007, 7:59 pm — Mark
Filed under: News Analysis

Talking Points Memo reported new figures from the American Research Group indicating George Bush’s Job Approval rating had nosed down to a new record low: 27%! (Newsweek, lefty bastards, had him at 26%, so props to ARG for their fair and balanced stats.)

This is alarming. It wasn’t long into the second term before the sheer weight of Bush Administration corruption and imperial pretensions started taking their toll on the American psyche, so we all pretty much knew that these approval ratings were going to head south, but they are now falling at an increasing rate, like trapped in some sort of Gravity Well of Despond. The following chart uses the ARG stats for the past 13 months and fits it to a polynomial trend for the next 12:

Bush Ratings Projection

This is VERY BAD. We do not currently have polling mathematics in place to account for the inevitable pull to negative numbers. We’ve gone from steady decline to freefall and I personally find myself constantly mouthing the words “Pull up Maverick! You’re comin’ in too hot!”

As the downward slope increases, one can’t but notice the similarities to the funnel-like design of Dante’s Inferno and should expect to see evidence of all classes of governmental sin come rocketing past our eyes as it all comes crashing down: Lust, Gluttony, Prodigality, Avarice … it’s going to get nasty. (Well … nastier).

And I don’t even want to guess what happens when it all goes into the Negative Zone. Impeachment may be merciful. In other historical scenarios it turns into Guillotines and Angry Mobs, or Heads on Pikes outside the Tower of London.



Harry Potter at the Pentagon

Thursday June 21st 2007, 4:01 pm — Al
Filed under: Bizarre Beliefs


Deleted Emails May Rise From The Dead

Wednesday June 20th 2007, 5:58 pm — Mark
Filed under: Bizarre Beliefs


The Nuts in Charge of the Asylum

Tuesday June 19th 2007, 4:22 pm — Al
Filed under: Bizarre Beliefs


Candy-Stripers for Jesus

Thursday June 14th 2007, 10:26 am — Al
Filed under: Bizarre Beliefs


Small-Brain Pollution

Monday June 11th 2007, 5:49 pm — Al
Filed under: Beltway Anthropology


Nancy on Hillary

Saturday June 09th 2007, 8:21 pm — Al
Filed under: News Analysis


Quantum Entanglements

Friday June 08th 2007, 9:50 pm — Al
Filed under: Bizarre Beliefs

 






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